Thursday, September 19, 2013

Ask for Forgiveness, Not Permission

Monday was our one month anniversary. Quick synopsis of where things stand:

Ped is a rockstar at his job.
I still don't have a job.
The house is still perfect.
The garden was taken over by a large buck who ate all of our tomatoes.
     (Per my MA 120 class: If a large buck eats all of your tomatoes, Bethany will stop caring about the garden.
      The conclusion is true which makes the whole statement true.)
Calculus class is starting to click.
We get along fairly well with each other; disagreements are lasting much shorter. 
Our house gets really cold when the temperature outside drops below 80.
Neither of us has lost our rings yet.

That's the high end overview. I love Ped more every day and love being his wife. Housewife? Not so much, but definitely his wife.

Now here is something new I have learned about us:

I am a logical thinker. To make something happen, I quickly organize all of the parts in my head in the order they need to be completed. Then I analyze if there's a cheaper option. Yada yada yada.

Ped knocks a wall down during a commercial break because he felt like it was time. At noon. On a Sunday. When he had a very busy week coming up.

Because he is doing 99% of the work, this was my first lesson in "shut the heck up and let him do it his way". I could list all of the issues with this random act of demolition but I won't*. I have learned that if Ped wants something done, he does it and then figures out if it's going to work. Sort of like "ask for forgiveness, not permission". I was told my entire career that I should be more like this but just didn't have it in me.

This is not to say my way is right and his way is wrong. In fact, if we were to have approached the wall from my way, it would be completed in May after we used the fireplace all winter. I would still be making lists and combing Home Depot ads to see when things were on sale. Because we approached it from Ped's way, our living room will be complete by the time we are able to start hosting guests next month and I will have a mantel to hang Christmas stockings on this year. My way would have been acceptable, but Ped's way is much better.

Soooo how excited am I for Christmas now?!?!?!?!?!?

Note to Ped: I know you are reading this post. I appreciate that you think differently than me. This is not my way of saying you are always right.

*Ok I have to but only to satisfy my writer's need to explain myself: the tiles we just put up the night before had to be taken down, we don't have a mantel yet to put on the wall, we can't use the fireplace now though it's the perfect weather for it this week. Phew, now I feel better.

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